Equanimity / Self Portrait

I’ve been working on a self portrait for the past week for an open competition.I wanted to see if I could sculpt from photographs and also couldn’t actually get anyone to model for me, so at the risk of looking like a flaming narcissist I thought I’d try to sculpt myself. I’m going to cast it into cement when it’s finished and paint the flowers in bright colours.What’s quite funny is that I showed these pictures to my work colleagues from my saturday shop job, and they laughed and said it was a familiar expression,as I’m always standing at the till and staring out the window into space.

I always forget how exciting it is to sculpt life size and lose all sense of time and place…once again I find myself occupying an imaginary world where I could fill a whole room with sculpted people….and who would they be?.. and what would they be thinking?

I’ve called this post  ‘Equanimity’ because it’s a state I think I reach when I’m left alone to sculpt….and it’s a state I’d like to be able to maintain in my ordinary life but, despite recently completing a mindfulness course, I rarely manage it. The definition of  equanimity is  “A state of stability or composure arising from a deep awareness and acceptance of the present moment.” Wouldn’t it be wonderful to feel like that all the time and to understand that nothing is truly separate.

After thinking about this concept for a few days I found this interesting quote by an author called Patrick White. “Those who are doomed to become artists are seldom blessed with equanimity. They are tossed to drunken heights, only to be brought down to a sludge of headachy despair; their arrogance gives way to humiliation at the next curve of the switchback.”

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